Who am I & Why does what I say matter?

I know some people have read the first post & are thinking who is this person?

And why should I believe them.

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This is the thing..when I say I have been running from abuse my whole life I mean..no matter what it is around us always.

Being in vulnerable positions puts me in a unique place to say that

....that’s usually where a lot of these people like to be in the first place. Hiding in plain sight.

Its perfect. There are people you can help & seem like a savior or this really good person too & its also chalk full of people who don’t realize they are being abused, don’t know how to deal with it or somehow can be used to play games with.

Secrets & embarrassment keep people from speaking about their experiences, fueling those who engage in this behavior to think they are invincible. Because if you speak about anything you are a troublemaker or full of drama right?

Even in my experience with True Love Studios & Sandra/Eric I took down the info about it after almost a year, not because I was scared of anything associated with it or wasn’t going to address it eventually...but because I didn’t want it to define my “algorithm”. Because I hate giving attention to people who just want an opportunity to go back & forth with in their drama spirals. Even tho they are scared of the fallout..this is the trauma experience they cycle thru weekly. And they need this shit to feel alive. How boring. These are some great places to read about experiences with covert narcissists.

Dr. Ramani Durvasula @doctorramani, @_Synful, Steven Ingram @​the_bat_wolf

While I have been hurt or affected over the years by abusers or covert narcissists. I have also.....learned a lot.

My perspective is different in some ways from other people because I don’t prescribe to the throwaway nature of what a lot of what the conversation is around Narcissism. I think we all have some type of “personality disorder”. What is that even?

Once upon of time not that long ago..we lived in tents understanding nature & danger..trying to survive.

Now we live inside of these structures, think we are safe and for some reason think that everyone acting the same is what’s normal. Meanwhile everyone is glitching out, acting out..trying to fit in these molds that were never meant to exist in such ways. I do think there is healthy Narcissism in the world. Its necessary to get anything significant done.

With that said...Unhealthy narcissism...especially in covert for is incredibly dangerous. Even to the person that exhibits this behavior. Thinking your invincible, when you are just delusional is dangerous. Not just to you, but the people around you.

I saw this happen several times over the past 2 years demonstrated in Sandra’s behavior, including the people around her in her schemes. Not only did she scam her original business partner at True Love, but her behavior was on full display for the owners & management partners of multimillion dollar property she was leasing space out of.. often using artists money to not pay rent on the space they were dependent on & lying about various things. She went on after this happen to continue to continue to scam significant amounts of money from people..even the people in the original space...mind you..this is after she got kicked out of the space...smh smuggle drugs across a border..make a video & brag about it, break into the building & have footage of that happening and much, much more. Even after getting in trouble for these things... She still continues to participate in the bullshit. Why? Drugs definitely play a part...but because she’s good at tricking people. She knows how she is “supposed” to act & what she is “supposed” to say. And acting like all that has happened.. didn’t happen..in all her delusion is a part of the daily description of a covert narcissist. Being a nurse & a part of the professional world was a great front for people to think she would not behave in this manner. She is a great example of a person that thinks just because she has had a business, a career..some people that can vouch for her being nice to them.. that she thought & still thinks that’s all she needs.

I don’t know if ya’ll know..Selena’s killer..Yolanda Saldivar...was a nurse & does in fact still think that what happened was not her fault.

That’s why what has happened with Gwen & Sean doesn’t surprise me. They have continually made...bad decision after bad decision thinking that their personas protect them. I can go to a church & hear a pastor say all the right things...

But just because they say the right things doesn’t mean they are practicing these things in their actual life.

Especially when your business is actually based off of saying all the right things to capture the algorithm on social media.